Generosity

In the last 5 days we've received generous gifts of all kinds of amounts, including gifts of multiple hundreds of dollars and $10; and, truly, each of those gifts have been incredibly generous! The heart behind that $10 donation and the heart behind the multi-hundred dollar gifts, we deeply believe and trust, are one in the same. Generosity looks different person to person but all *true* generosity is a heart issue. I've given bigger (emphasis on the 'er' not the big) sums of money that were not generous and I never heard of any stories of the person I'd given that money having any kind of break through. Conversely, I've given smaller amounts out a place of conviction and love (true generosity) and heard of that small amount being a huge blessing. Jesus talked about this much more eloquently than I ever could when He pointed out to His disciples that the rich folks made a spectacle of dropping large chunks of money in the collection plate and they received their reward by having others ooo and ahhh. In contrast, Jesus pointed out, the poor widow who dropped in two small copper coins gave eternally more than the show-y folks. It's a heart issue. To be clear: you can be wealthy and truly generous! And, in the same way, you can be in poverty and quite greedy.

I say all that to get to here: we are in need of generosity. We've had about $1800 come in in the last 5 days (such a blessing!!) by way of donations and you all buying our shirts and jewelry. That means we need to raise about $5200 in the next couple of days (by Friday afternoon) to cover our next batch of costs (legal fees and money we are providing our birth mother to help with rent and medical expenses). We have a faithful God who keeps on providing so we know He will continue to do so! And, perhaps, He's using you to His end of provision.

A question we've been asked is "OK, but what if you don't get the money?" - and we have only one answer: God is faithful and it WILL happen! If we need to take out loans or use credit, we will absolutely do that; this baby - our baby! - is coming home. We refuse to guilt anyone into giving us money and we also know that the sovereign God of the universe has called us to adopt this baby boy or girl so we're excited to see how He will provide (again)!

Care to join us? C'mon c'mon!

Wayne

$7,000

Hey friends, thanks for all who have so faithfully and graciously joined us on this journey to bring home Baby Patterson - we hope that our gratitude is clearly and consistently expressed! We have a big and expensive ask in this post and we feel like we ask more than we express gratitude so if we say thank you an annoying amount, well, it's to make sure we express our deep gratitude in light of our feelings of apprehension (and even guilt) in asking.

We have $4100 in our adoption account from ongoing fundraising the past year plus and we have had another couple of hundred come in from t-shirt sales and jewelry which is fantastic because we have our next major chunk of money due to the tune of about $11,500 (legal + money to help our birth mom + updating home study) meaning we need to come up with $7,000 in the next week or so.

We hope you will continue to consider us as we have goods for sale that can make great Christmas presents, AND, very boldly, we are asking if you would consider a monetary donation of any size. We will have to do a similar ask again in a few weeks (not as much but still bold) so know that this audacious ask is going to be compounded by further asks. This is our reality and keeps us humble (and honestly, in our flesh, we feel some measure of guilt and even embarrassment and yet we remember that God has called us to this and we're reminded that He's the faithful one who keeps providing through each of you and the guilt and embarrassment subside).

So, there you have it. We need to raise $7000 in the next 7 days. IF you're up for take a chipping in on that:
1) go to our You Caring site or
2) send a check to Bethany and Wayne Patterson 6034 SW 85th St Gainesville, FL 32608 or
3) use Venmo  (app or online) and search for Wayne Patterson or 7574127432

Thanks so much, we love you and are grateful for each of you,

Bethany and Wayne

Fund raising stuff!

Some of the most common questions we've been asked in is "how much money do you guys have left to raise?" and the very similar "how can we help?" and, in the same vein, "can we throw you guys a shower??" Phenomenal questions! I'll answer the last one first: SURE! We still need to get a few details figured out (like gender, which seems to be important when having a baby shower; we're new at this so we're learning as we go). On to the first two questions, money and help! And...we don't know. Well, we know some things that we can share and we know other things we can't publicly mention (like pre-set amounts we are willing to give to our birth mom and how much we are specifically paying to our lawyers, that sort of thing).

Sounds nice and ambiguous, eh? Sorry about that, truly we are. If you have questions and want specific answer and are comfortable keeping information to yourself and your family, please feel free to call or email us any time. We can tell you more person-to-person than we can say publicly as this is, largely, a legal procedure. That sounds cold and crass as we know this 'legal procedure' ends with our baby home with us, but we have to navigate things carefully. You understand, so moving on.

Going forward we will be looking at spending around $19,000 (including an updated home study, two lawyers, travel expenses, hospital expenses for the birth mom and for ourselves, financial support for our birth mom). With ongoing fundraising from you generous people we've raised almost $14,000 (that has been spent mostly on the adoption agency, home study round one and fees associated with those two) and we have $4100 of that still in the bank MEANING, we will be fundraising for the balance of ~$18,900. If that hasn't lost you yet, that means this adoption will come in somewhere around $34,000. I hope when you read that number you know that we would never have logically jumped into this - we serve a God who has called us to this adoption and we know that He will see us through, AND we know He is using so many of you as a part of His plan to bring home Baby Patterson! Please, if you're considering adoption (and we genuinely encourage you to at least consider adoption), don't let $$ be the reason you stop. Adoption is amazing and we lovingly encourage you to take the risky and wonderful step of faith to begin!

SO, how are we going to fund raise for this last $15k or so? Great question! Several ways:
- One: the t-shirt sales! You guys have already ordered over 50 which will raise almost $600 and we've had requests for more - click that link to be taken to the page with the details on ordering/donating for those
- We are also selling handmade Ugandan jewelry! Check out this page on our site and let us know which colors you'd like - 100% of what you pay for the bracelets and necklaces goes to funding bringing Baby Patterson home
- We haven't published this yet, but you can save this date: Saturday morning, January 10th our buddy, Rob Goldsmith's awesome company Fund Racers is hosting Run For Adoption 5k in the Haile Village with all proceeds going to our adoption fund - sign ups will start soon AND if you are business and would be interested in sponsoring this event, follow the Fund Racers link or email me and we will get you set up.
- Donations of any kind! We have set up specific site for fundraising with the total amount, $14,900 that you can donate any time, any amount - this site, youcaring.com, has an option for you to NOT have to pay any fees (wonderful!!) but you have to select that, it won't just default to no fee. If you feel compelled to pay the minimum fee (or any fee for that matter) feel free! It's a great site that gives its services for free because of those voluntary fees - just know that those fees don't go to us. Cool? We will update the total amount needed on that page as we get funds in from various avenues
- In addition to the site linked, you can send cash or checks (6034 SW 85th St., Gainesville, FL 32608), use the Venmo service, PayPal (linked on the front page of our blog) or you can come visit us and donate hugs!
- We WILL have baby showers (in multiple geographic locations) but haven't nailed those down just yet; we are very grateful for the generosity of folks wanting to throw us baby showers! We will let folks know when and where those will be. If, however, you have a mini van that you'd like to donate...you can do that any time (I have deleted that line several times and feel compelled to leave it. God is a big God, so I will post that in faith and leave it at that).
- We are prayerfully trying to be as judicious and Christ-honoring with all of these funds coming in from you sweet people; if, after we get to Baby Patterson's due date, we have extra funds, we will gladly work through the details of getting you your hard earned money back OR we can pay it forward to other families going through the adoption process. We will discuss that when it gets closer, but just so you know, we desire to be good stewards with these lavishly given resources.

Surely you haven't read every word of this (LOTS and lots of information...) so feel free to ask anything any time! We are forever grateful for each of you and can't wait to tell our son or daughter the story/stories of how so many people loved them before they drew breath. We love you all,

For His Kingdom and glory,
Bethany and Wayne

Another cool way to help out

Our first batch of t-shirts have been ordered and we will start getting those in the mail in the next week and a half or so. We're excited to highlight another way you all can help us bring home Baby Patterson AND get some great stuff to use as Christmas presents or to add to your repertoire of awesome jewelry.

Our dear, sweet friends Scott and Whitney Waechter (who have been SO helpful in coaching us along in this adoption process) have graciously donated over 120 hand made paper bead necklaces and bracelents; here's a little info from Whitney:

The paper bead necklaces are hand made by women in Uganda who make them and sell them in the market places to provide food, shelter, and school fees for their children. So by purchasing a necklace, folks are helping your sweet baby join your family AND also helping impoverished women across the world feed and care for their children.:)

SO, we are happy to offer these awesome bracelets for $15 and necklaces for $25 with 100% of that money going to cover costs associated with bringing home Baby Patterson. Here's the deal on these great pieces: there are NO TWO ALIKE! That is awesome but will require a little flexibility on your part; if you want a certain color, we will do whatever we can to match that and send you the perfect one. Cool? Cool! Here are a few pictures to give you an idea of how great these are, including some of the women who made them!

Love 'em, dontcha?? We do too! Some of you have seen Bethany wear these and, well, if Bethany wears them, you know they're amazing. ORDERING: email Wayne (wayne.rivercross@gmail.com) with colors you'd like, how many and if you want a necklace or bracelet (and how many of each). Payment:

1) You can send us a check to:

Wayne and Bethany Patterson

6034 SW 85th St

Gainesville, FL 32608

If you don't live in Gainesville, add $5-8 to the total on the check for shipping; we're not going to try and go crazy calculating all the shipping to specifically, but if you live in Australia or something, add a few more bucks. Also, put 'Ugandan jewelry' in the memo line

2) You can use our PayPal donation account; you can do the same thing as with a check: total up your order ($15/bracelet, $25/necklace) and make a note of that on the PayPay page

3) You can use Venmo - a very safe, David Patterson-approved, money sharing site that also has a great iPhone and Android app. You can search for me (Wayne) by putting in my name or phone number (7574127432). It will ask you what the payment is for; Ugandan jewelry for that

4) You can find Bethany or I and just pay us in person, using any kind of money, even sacks of gold. Naw, don't use gold. Or BitCoin. We can't accept either of those.

Cool? Thanks so much! Let us know if you have any questions!

Bethany and Wayne

We're having a baby!

Dear wonderful family and friends: it has happened! This Monday we received a call from Jenna at Angel Adoptions saying she had a birth mom who "REALLY like your profile and would like to speak to you by phone"! We talked and prayed for a couple of hours and Monday evening spoke on the phone with this prospective birth mom and it went fantastic - we had lots in common, she is excited about blessing us, and we felt an immediate and deep connection. It couldn't have been a better phone call.

Today we spoke with Jenna again after she had followed up with our birth mother and confirmed that all was great and that we can begin to work with a local lawyer (that they love and trust). And, if all goes well, we will be parents on February 8th - only 15 and a half weeks from now! Wow!

So, some questions we have already been asked and that we will try and answer quickly here and in more detail in the near future:

1) we will find out the gender next week - so crazy!
2) we can't publicly say where our birth mom is from/where she will be delivering the baby
3) YES, we will have lots of fundraising needs, especially in regards to the legal proceedings. It can be between $4,000 and $20,000 BUT, we don't know any hard numbers right now until we've spoke with the attorney that works with Angel. We will keep you posted specifically on that as soon as we can
4) we WILL have some baby showers but won't know when those will be until we know the gender and have settled out a few other details (this is all happening wonderfully fast!)
5) until our baby is home (and therefore relinquishment laws have passed) NOTHING is official. Please keep praying for this process as we have been encouraged by our adoption coordinators to temper our excitement (just slightly!) with the knowledge that until Baby Patterson is home, there are still variables (the birth mom could change her mind, for example).


I'm sure there are other questions that you have so please, feel free to ask!

Thank you all so very much for your love and prayers and support - we serve a gracious God who has a deep desire to see all children in loving homes and we feel honored that He has chosen us to bring this baby home.

Love you all,

Bethany and Wayne (and soon-to-be-home Baby Patterson!)

T-shirt!

Hello crew, we wanted to let you know as soon as possible that we could that we are starting TWO fundraising opportunities that will be ways for you wonderful and generous people to help us as you buy Christmas presents for your friends and family. We will always accept donations but there's something great about giving something with each donation - plus, it's a tangible reminder to pray with us AND a way to tell the story of adoption!

SO: item one is a t-shirt (pictured below) that we will be selling for $20. I have not ordered them yet but I will once I've taken an initial pre-order from you all. Please comment below or email me (Wayne - wayne.rivercross@gmail.com) with your order (just a how many and sizes, no money yet!) and we'll get the ball rolling from there. Make sense? Readysetgo!

Payment:

1) You can send us a check to:

Wayne and Bethany Patterson

6034 SW 85th St

Gainesville, FL 32608

If you don't live in Gainesville, add $5-8 to the total on the check for shipping; we're not going to try and go crazy calculating all the shipping to specifically, but if you live in Australia or something, add a few more bucks. Also, put 'Fundraiser t-shirt' in the memo line

2) You can use our PayPal donation account; you can do the same thing as with a check: total up your order ($15/bracelet, $25/necklace) and make a note of that on the PayPay page

3) You can use Venmo - a very safe, David Patterson-approved, money sharing site that also has a great iPhone and Android app. You can search for me (Wayne) by putting in my name or phone number (7574127432). It will ask you what the payment is for; Fundraiser t-shirt for that

4) You can find Bethany or I and just pay us in person, using any kind of money, even sacks of gold. Naw, don't use gold. Or BitCoin. We can't accept either of those.

Month 8

Monday marked the start of our 8th month of waiting for Baby Patterson to come home - 8 months! That simultaneously sounds like an eternity and a blip. 8 months simultaneously feels like an eternity and a blip. 

'How's it going with the adoption?' is a common question we are asked and sometimes that can be fantastic and sometimes that can be draining. Mostly our answer is 'great!' because it is, in fact, GREAT. I mean, God has already allowed us to raise over $12k! We've already been able to encourage several couples to dive into the scary-yet-wonderful process of adoption! We've learned more about the heart of our Heavenly Father than we could have ever anticipated! So, it is great. And yet there's always a desire to answer that question 'how's it going with the adoption?' with a definitive, quantifiable answer. We can tell you we are have over 80 prospective birth moms that have requested our full profile and we can tell you that because of a recent donation we've been able to increase the amount we are able to financially support a potential birth mother and we can tell you that we're in the top of the bell curve (months 7-14 are when most birth moms select adoptive parents in our program) and all of those things are wonderful but they don't exactly tell the story. 

We are waiting* for our child to come home and no definitive, quantifiable measurements help that waiting go faster. We are waiting for our family to expand, for that tan room to become our baby's room, for you all to finally get the 'ok, NOW you can throw us that shower', for our parents to get the privilege of spoiling their grand kid. So, 8 months feels like an eternity.

BUT BUT BUT! Jesus. Jesus changes everything. Jesus pursued us through everything - through every mess up and stubbornness we could throw at Him. He pursued us through much more than we could ever imagine pursuing our child, through much more than any red tape or bureaucracy or financial hardship. 

8 months. An eternity and a blip all at once. Thanks for praying with and for us.

Bethany and Wayne

*a lot of what we're learning on waiting comes from dear friends who are running the race ahead of us. Here's a link to an incredible post by one of our friends Dave on how waiting isn't nothing. Have a read

Beautiful, hand-picked team

Adoption is a process in much the same way as learning to ride a bike while learning to play the violin while learning to eat a burrito without making a mess. It's an inexact science that feels messy and impossible.

That is why it has been such a sweet blessing to have the beautiful, hand-picked team of supporters we have around us. So many of you have leaned into us during this process and we are so very thankful! And, in particular, God has blessed us with sojourners who are further down the path than we, people who have and do turn around and shout with love and grace-filled lungs 'keep going! You're doing great! You're almost there!'

It is to these dear people - Dave and Donna, Dave and Maggie, Scott and Whitney - that we are especially thankful for today. We would ask that you all who read this would know you play a special and vital role in our lives AND know that in different ways and seasons, God gives us particular people to reveal Himself to us.

We'd also like to issue a small, prayerful challenge: find those beautiful, hand-picked (by God) people who are leading you in this race and thank them. Readysetgo!

Love you all,
Bethany and Wayne

A looooong overdue update!

Hello friends! Sorry for the lengthy hiatus of blogging our adoption adventure...a mixture of moving and trips and laziness has kept us from being diligent in updating. Many thanks to all of you, as you've been consistent and loving in asking how things are going and in prayer - it's because of these tangible pictures of love that we want to more regularly update you all on how things are going. OK, enough of that, on to updates!

- Once/month our agency sends us an email with an update on how offend our profile is viewed (which is, thanks to many of you, a pretty substantial number!) and, more importantly, we are given an update on how often our full profile is requested by birth mothers; this number is an indicator that we are piquing the interest of potential birth mothers AND is also a number we are (prayerfully) not getting too hung up on - a birth mother can select dozens of profiles for further review if she pleases (and she is encouraged to do just that! It's a big decision and we want her to have as much information about as many adoptive parents as she can)

- Our profile was requested by 4 birth mothers February 10 - March 10, 9 times between March and April and 14 times between April and May. Pretty cool indeed!

- We recently moved into our first house (woot!) and are excited to add that to our profile as we will have even more space for Baby Patterson to grow up in (don't worry, we are still super close to Haile Village and our family). Many of our local friends have asked if we will have a house warming party and the answer is YES - and, many of you gracious people have asked the follow up question about gifts and, for now, it's probably best to just do Target or Home Depot gift cards (I know...boring) as we get ourselves situated 

- Some have asked for updates on fundraising and so we will post a separate update about that soon

- One last FAQ we have been asked recently: 'can we share your profile on line/Twitter/Facebook/etc?' and that's a big ol affirmative! Repost and share  as much as you want - any birth mother out there who finds our Angel Adoption profile will be directed to our coordinators, so YES, please post that profile link ( http://www.angeladoptioninc.com/birthmothers/choose-a-family/profile/wayne-bethany.html ) all over the place

Thanks for all the love and prayers, our hearts are full and we are experiencing the daily Grace of God in the journey. Love to you all,

Bethany and Wayne 

Update: money stuff

We've had several questions recently about how fundraising is going and what is next in that regard. We have raised $11,400. READ THAT AGAIN. WOOWWW. Have we thanked you all lately for helping make that happen?? 

We sent $7200 of that total to Angel Adoptions 2 month ago so here's a break down/overview of what's next...maybe:
- Medical expenses for the birth mother; not all birth mothers need assistance so this number could be $0 or it could be $2400. We have put in our profile that we are willing to assist if the birth mother has a need. Our agency coordinators will give our profiles to mothers who need assistance AND mothers who don't - by being willing to assist we hit a wider range of birth mothers
- Travel expenses to meet the birth mother if she desires that; so this could also be $0 or it could be $3000+ if she lives in the middle of Washington. Again, in an attempt to be able to connect to the most birth mothers possible, we put in that we are WILLING to travel, if that is something a birth mother so desires
- Legal fees; this will range from $3000 to $10,000 depending on which state our birth mother is from, if there are any special laws in that state, etc. If a birth mother from Florida chooses us, this will dramatically reduce this cost. If a birth mother from Colorado (currently a difficult legal state to adopt from) that number could easily go to high side of that range (or over)
- Hospital and hotel stay during the birth of our child: this one is a totally wide open number; we will need to stay in a hotel in the city where our birth mother gives birth from up to 2 weeks and we will need to get an adjacent room to her in the hospital for up to 3 days (well, that 'up to' could go any direction but we are required to plan on being in the hospital for 3 days). 

OK, that's a lot of information so here's the summary: we could still be on the hook for up to $18-20k or that number could much closer to $6-7k. You generous people have asked how to continue to help financially. There you have it - we have right around $4200 in the bank to go towards what's next. 

Love you all!!

Bethany and Wayne 

Our profile is alive!

That's right, friends, our adoption profile is live and out there for a birth mother to see. Wow!!

Here's what this means with a lmore detail: 

- A paper version of our profile will be sent from our agency (Angel Adoptions) to their local contacts (example: Women's Resource Center in Gainesville or a church they trust in Atlanta or a birth mom they have connected with in the past)

- Those paper versions are already being sent out 

- The paper version (we'll post some pictures of that) is a format that many birth mothers appreciate over electronic versions; there is, however, an electronic version as well - AND you can check it out right now! 

http://www.angeladoptioninc.com/birthmothers/choose-a-family/profile/wayne-bethany.html

- That link will you take you to the profile that anyone can find, including potential birth mothers. It is not, however, the extensive profile that a birth mother will have access to if she partners with Angel Adoptions

- You are welcome to repost that link 

- We will receive monthly updates and we'll hear how many times our profile was sent out and how many birth mothers were interested in our profile; Wayne is overly excited about these monthly updates, because, well, he sucks at waiting and not doing something (another post coming about that - waiting isn't nothing, and how hard that is to live in; thank you Dave Ainsworth for your wisdom and guidance there)

- There are elements of our profile that you won't be able to see, specific parameters that are for birth mothers to use when deciding if we are the adoptive parents she wants to choose; as an example, we have indicated we are willing to travel to meet our birth mother before she chooses us. We won't go over all of these parameters but we want you to know so you can get a glimpse at how we are waiting and how we are trying to increase the number of potential birth mothers we connect with

- If you guys have any questions about any of this, let us know! wayne.rivercross@gmail.com is the best way to ask questions.

Prayer request: Would you all pray with us that our profile would be found by the right birth mother? Would you also pray for our hearts as we wait for our child to come into our home? We do not have any fairy tale idea of a child completing us AND we very much look forward to the privilege of parenting. God is a good, gracious and perfect Father and we want

to reflect that into our child's life.

Thank you all for your continues support!

Bethany and Wayne 

PROFILE TIME!

Hey friends, a quick update that will lead into a bunch of updates: we have begun working on our Adoption Profile!

This is a big step as this will be the main avenue for a birth mother to choose us as the parents she would like bless with a child. Even as we type that it sounds crazier and bigger than we could ever imagine - and, more that crazy and big, it feels more and more REAL than ever before!

Our profile will consist of pictures (of us, our family, our home, neighborhood and things we like to do), our adoption story (why we are so excited about adoption), about us (who we are, where we're from, favorite movie, etc.) and a letter to our birth mother. We're humbled and honored to be able to tell our birth mother that we have an amazing community of people who are already walking with us and will be by our side every step of the way. Here's the page on Angel Adoption that shows portions of the profile (many more details are available for a birth mother to look through if she likes a profile).

Would you join us in praying for a birth mother to choose us? Would you pray for her to be safe and loved and valued during this difficult time?

We'll be updating you soon on when we finish the profile AND, if you'd like, you can email Wayne (wayne.rivercross@gmail.com) with any pictures you have of us and you that you would be OK with us including in our profile (have to be high quality and have to be .jpg though!).

More soon, love you all!

Bethany and Wayne